23. Sayings Nov 23 Thu

(2:42 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"Nothing wrong with me that money won't cure." (CB Tony Duncombe : DT ??)

(2:47 pm Nov 23, 2006)

(4:48 pm Nov 23, 2006)

(5:12 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Not good, not good.

How can one write? How? Gentle reader, how?

(5:37 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Once again, gentle reader, life interrupts art. Well, if this can rightly be called art. Literature. Well.

Plans sidetracked. yes, sidetracked.

You see, this is thanks giving day in the U.S. of A. Not down here in this country, but across the way.

I have been taking the day as a holiday even though it isn't since school days when my folks let me cut school to watch the games.

I had been planning to take the day off today as well. No go. I had to go in to deal with a pbx issue and more. I wanted to stay home and write. Perhaps even do a big day and cross fifty thousand in one bang up effort. No go.

I did not even get to come home after picking up my son but had to take him to visit family that came into town today. As you might have figured out, I have tried to make starts several times today, but have instead sputtered. I am certainly not hitting on all cylinders yet. I may need a tune up. A fiction tune up. Yeah! That's what I need, a fiction tune up.

(5:48 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Man, how much would I like to blow off this day as far as writing and watch the rest of the game. but o. I have made a plan and I want to keep to it, no matter how much I don't want to at the same time. Write right! Right?

Right!

Six hundred sixty nine million, five hundred sixty seven, eight hundred eighty six total NaNo words and counting. And I helped.

It feels like someone is trying to build a wall between my brain and my fingers.

And like every time I try to pull down one block, they quickly lay two more. And furthermore, it feels like they are using some super quick drying mortar. I mean, it should be fairly easy to pull down blocks that have just been laid, but not these. Not at all.

(6:02 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Yes, walls, blocks, chains. Current. Like trying to swim through current cut at the wrong time. Something that you are not going to do unless you have some sort of help. And who or what will come to my aid, gentle reader? Who or what?

"Zotz, wassup? You having fun yet?"

"Honestly Bing, I've had enough of you and ya boy this year. You can't come around with your threats and then later come around trying to act like everything is honky dory. That just will not fly. no wya, no how! Go on now go. Later for you."

"Zotz, you need to come down off your high horse. Honestly now, no need to be so uppity. Like you tink you is people or something. Come down now."

"You've got a lot of nerve, you know that, don't you? A lot. Too much. Please, you are not helping."

"Of course I'm not helping zotz, do you have any idea how hard it is to help someone with an attitude like you have? You think you are having a hard time writing this thing tonight? You don't know what hard is until you try to help someone like you. Now that is hard!"

(6:30 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"Dat ain't no true!" (CB Azaleta Ishmael-Newry : DT ??)

Sangria.

"OK, so what? You have some smart proposal for me I guess. You and Boom are gonna ride in and save the day for me? What?"

"Yes, zotz, Boom and I have some ideas for you, but no, you know us soldiers aren't the kind to ride horses."

"Who said anything about horses, Bing? There you go getting your office exercise. Jumping to conclusions."

"For once you are right zotz, you didn't say anything about horses. So we could come riding in on a magic carpet! Cool! Could you write us in a scene like that zotz? That would be da bomb!"

"So, what? Now you are gonna tell me what scenes to put in my novel?"

"No! Stop getting so worked up. I'm not trying to tell you what you have to put in. I am making a request. Now who is getting their office exercise?"

(6:49 pm Nov 23, 2006)

(7:11 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"Zotz, where did you go? Did I scare you off? I didn't mean to."

"No, but it's none of your business. I just needed a break and let's leave it at that."

Gentle reader, I am losing motivation. Losing drive. Losing my mind. Losing my direction. OK, so let me make this soldier happy. let me do his magic carpet scene for him. I mean, why not, eh, gentle reader?

"OK, Bing, get ready. here it comes."

"Get ready for what zotz?"

"Just get ready, here it comes, here it comes."

Just then, Bruddah Boom came on the scene, I know you can guess what sort of lean he came on the scene with...

Boom, cam in carrying a cardboard tube under his arm, the kind that architects use.

(7:18 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Bing looked at Boom in a funny sort of way, "What ya got there Boom?"

"Hold your horses, Bing, hod your horses. Just you wait and you will see soon enough."

Boom, gentle laid the tube on the ground. He bent down and carefully pulled the plastic end cap from the tube. then, ever so gently, gentle reader, he pulled out a rolled up piece of thick material.

He grabbed two corners and flicked his wrists. The rectangular, highly decorated, rug came to rest about six inches above the ground. Boom hopped on, "Come on Bing, climb aboard!"

"Zotz, you didn't! Man, cool! Here comes the man Boom, make room boom, make room!"

(7:25 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"You got roach on ya bread." (CB Jeremy Knowles : DT ??)

(7:55 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"Wow! Zotz! If i told you where we've been, you would surely think I'm crazy. Well, crazy or high on that sweet green grass from back down home! Zotz, we've just got back from the dark side of the moon. Oh, and by the way, that man in the moon story, don't make me laugh! And green cheese? let's don't go there at all! I know, there goes your cherished childhood memories. Sorry Gentle, didn't see you there, sorry if I burst your bubble. The news from childhood isn't all bad though, we did see this one cow up there with her body laid out like those athletes going over the bars and into the pits. We asked her who she was as we went whizzing by. The bes we could make out is that her middle name is Danger or something like that. It was hard to hear in that thin atmosphere up there on the moon."

"So wait, you soldiers went to the dark side of the moon? I didn't know that magic carpets could make it all the way up there. I would not have let you two out of my sight if I knew you were going off planet. Now I am going to have to deal with the UFO sighting suppression agencies. Those guys are ruthless. You do not want to cross them. They make even your family look like pre-schoolers. And that is saying something."

(8:04 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"That's where we've been zotz, man I can't thank you enough. Consider your book not only safe, but under the family's protection. Wow!"

"So... come on... what was it like on the dark side?"

"Well, you aren't gonna believe this either, it was way cool, but the one thing it wasn't is dark. I mean it was lit right up bright, almost like daylight! Ain't that right Boom?"

"Thas right Bing, lit right up like dey was ready for some rake-n-scrape party. Like dey was plannin' on mashin' up one whole pile a roach. I wouldn't like ta see da bill at dat roach motel, no siree! Lit right up! I wouldn't wanna see dat B.E.C. bill neither. No siree Bob!"

"So wait! You two are trying to tell me that the dark side of the moon isn't dark!"

"Thas just what we is tellin' you zotz ma man. Not dark at all!"

"How can that be? Surely all of those moon probes would have discovered that by now and it would be common knowledge!"

"Well, maybe common knowledge is a little like common sense?" said Boom.

"Don't listen to him zotz, he's just pullin' your leg. What happened was... You tink I could get one job at one radio station? No, no, wait... What happened was... an we know this for a fact, when one a dem moon sacalite tings come bussin round da dark side, erryting went dark before you could blink, den when da sacalite buss back roun de bright side, erryting light right back up! Very strange. More strange dan people. I tell you dat!"

(8:18 pm Nov 23, 2006)

(8:38 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Ahhh, the time it took to scrounge up this last saying for the day...

"Tingum in da bush ain't got no name!" (CB Mark Hayling : DT ??)

Let me get back to these two soldiers gentle reader.

"So, guys, are you trying to get me to believe that the dark side of the moon is all lit up but that when something comes around that could see that it is all lit up that it goes dark until the potential observer leaves the line of sight?"

"Yup, that's about it zotz. What happened to you there? Brain freeze up? I mean, you were just standing there like a stone carving. Weird, man."

"So, tell me this Bing, why did they let you see? Why didn't they go dark when you two got around to that side? Huh?"

"Hmmm. Ahhhh. Boom? You have any ideas? Why did they not go dark when we showed up?"

(8:45 pm Nov 23, 2006)

"Well, gee, I don't know Bing, maybe that carpet has cloaking abilities as well as being able to fly? Maybe we were flying low?"

"Boom, my zipper wasn't down, was yours?"

"Don't be such a fool Bing! This might be serious."

Friends, now I done told you about some people! Yes friends, some people want your things. And friends, I know you done called the doctor. I know you done told him to rise up. Tonight friends, I want to talk to you about candles.

(8:57 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Now you may be walking down the road of life. Walking I say. You may be walking along, minding your business. Your own business.

Walking along I say. With your candle lit, trying to find your way on the road of life in the darkness.

Now friend, if you see someone walking down the road with you and their candle isn't lit, just reach out your candle. Touch your flame to their wick. You light their candle for them.

Now friend, don't go asking them to pay you for a light. Just you light their candle.

It is not gonna cost you anything to light up their candle for them. Light it.

Friends, when you light up some more candles and they light up some candles, you can all see better on your journey down the road of life.

Yes friend, you get the benefit of his light, and he gets the benefit of your light.

Now friend, it gets even better. Suppose you were walking down that old road of life alone, just you and your one little candle, Or maybe you were walking down that old road and there were ten people walking with you, but all of their candles were out. Now suppose while you were walking down that old road with that one candle lit up that some gust of wind, some teeny tine little gust of wind was to come along and blow out your candle.

You would be in the dark on that road of life.

But friends. If you had lit up someone else's candle, when your went out, one of them could light you right back up.

(9:14 pm Nov 23, 2006)

So lite up that candle friend. Light up the candle of everyone you see. Light it up I say. But watch out! For some people! Call that doctor! Wake him up! Light that doctor's candle!

(9:19 pm Nov 23, 2006)

Goodnight gentle reader... Sleep calls. Sweet sleep and sweet dreams. What are those sweet dreams made of?