13. Sayings Nov 13 Mon

(2:25 pm Nov 13, 2006)

"You bes catch yourself!" (CB Chad Roberts : DT ??)

Well, gentle reader, the dreaded no voltage blues has struck! I am writing this longhand on old three ring binder paper. Who knows, it may even be from back in my school days!

I was just finishing a late lunch, I had the computer on and was getting ready to ssh in to the box that I write from and BAM! BEC shut me down. Hard!

Now, while it might have made sense on the weekend to drive in to another location to keep on writing, that does not hold with weekday traffic in play.

On top of that I am still short three sayings for today so in a little while, I am going to have to take a break from this inspiring prose and go hustle up a few more sayings. If only I would have had this bright idea in time to get all the needed sayings in hand before November began.

(2:34 pm Nov 13, 2006)

Man oh man, this is crazy. I am now reduced to counting the words on the paper by hand. Ouch!

The thing is, gentle reader, that I need to do this as I want to go to band practice tonight and I will not have the time if I don't get my writing done now. I got none done this morning so I am up against the proverbial wall about now.

The weird thing is, gentle reader, that when you get to read this, even if you are in ##zotz on irc.freenode.net, you will not be reading it when I am writing it and beyond that, if I ever release the IRC logs, the time stamps in the logs will not be anywhere near close to the times I am recording while I am writing this. And so we encounter the time warp again. Is the fabric of time unfolding?

The banana. The banana is a wondrous fruit. I mean, it grows on banana trees. It grows on banana trees, but prepackaged, ready to travel and ready to eat as it were.

((2:50 pm Nov 13, 2006)

It breaks down like this. A banana tree will grow a bunch of bananas. Now when I say a bunch of bananas, I don't mean to imply a lot of bananas, although, come to think of it, that is probably why a bunch of bananas is called a bunch of bananas. Be that as it may, a bunch in this case is not just another way of saying a lot. No, in this case, a bunch is a technical term. A scientific type term.

Now each bunch of bananas will be made up of multiple hands of bananas. A hand of bananas is a technical or scientific type term for the smaller groupings of bananas which, when put together go to make up a bunch of bananas. Actually, it is not when put together. They grow pre put together. You can separate a bunch into hands, but you can't really assemble hands into a bunch.

Now, each hand of bananas will be made up of multiple individual bananas. The bananas form the fingers of the hand as it were. All of which come prepackaged in their own individual banana skins. It is an amazing system really.

On top of that, the banana tastes great!

Another plus is that the banana is versatile.

(3:00 pm Nov 13, 2006)

I mean, you can just peel it and eat it right out of the skin. You can boil it. You can fry it up in a pan. You can bake it. You can split it. You can even flambe it. Use your imagination. Use a cook book. Use the internet.

"Where ignorance is bliss, tis folly to be wise." (CB Naomi Sands : DT Bill Hayling)

And that is just the eating part. there is the cooking and serving part. There is the shelter part. And let's not forget the suckers. No. When it comes to tha banana, suckers are vitally important. Why, without suckers, the banana would likely not long continue upon this earth. And what a loss that would be gentle reader. What a loss!

You know, gentle reader, if you are one of the people on this earth who are not taking part in the National Novel Writing Month contest right now, and you think you might like to write a novel of your own, and yet you fear it may be too late and you don't know where to begin... I bet you might have a good shot at it if you were to sign up right away and take as your title: 'The Banana Mystery, Or What Happened To All The Suckers?'

(3:21 pm Nov 13, 2006)

(3:30 pm Nov 13, 2006)

Well, the house was getting a bit hot without even a fan so I moved outside to the front yard. There is the slightest hint of a cool breeze trying to get my attention.

So, gentle reader, what do you think? Are you going to throw caution to the wind and sign up for the contest with week three almost upon us and try to win with flying colours by writing the banana mystery? If you put it under some sort of copyleft type license, I will look forward to reading it. If you happen to be reading this in 'not-near-real-time' then why don't you try for it in the upcoming contest?

Petro was becoming a bit concerned. Chloe was contacting him a bit too much. I mean, a pretty girl like her paying him so much attention was flattering and all but things were getting out of hand. Numerous phone calls, emails, instant messages, IRC chats, video calls, and so on were beginning to feel a bit over the top.

(3:38 pm Nov 13, 2006)

He was beginning to grow tired of the interruptions at work and, if the truth be told, at home as well. He was certainly happy that she didn't have his cell phone number.

Since yesterday, she had been trying to convince him to fly to London. She was talking of him doing some modeling gig for a friend of hers who was a photographer. When he objected to the expense, she had had multiple answers lying in wait. She would buy his ticket for him. Or perhaps even send her dad's jet aeroplane down to get him. Plus, he would earn a lot as the gig payed well. When he asked how much and she told him, his jaw dropped. It was tempting. If he could clear that kind of money, he could come back and take a year off from his job and put the time into some projects he wanted to get off the ground.

Why was he thinking of looking this gift horse in the mouth? Well, it sounded too good to be true, and that made him nervous. Then there was this new development with Loqui and he wanted to stay on top of that situation. There was no real breakthrough as yet that he could point to, but he felt the presence of encouraging signs. He did not want to miss his possibilities there.

(3:52 pm Nov 13, 2006)

On the other hand, that amount of money was nothing to sneeze at if it was legit. On the surface, Chloe seemed like a nice young woman. She was good looking. She was funny. She was loaded.

Then again, Loqui was the future Mrs. Stone so why risk messing that up with Chloe?

(4:00 pm Nov 13, 2006)

"In times of prosperity, Good friends are plenty. In times of adversity, Not one in twenty." (CB Gerald Cash : DT ??)

Well, gentle reader, I am past halfway to my daily goal and the power is still off. (Come on BEC, get your act together will you!) The power is still off and I am still writing this out longhand. I hope that when the power comes back on and it is time for me to type this in that I can actually read my own hand writing. There is a possibility that I won't be able to. You know what? At the end of the month, I will scan these pages in and post them somewhere on the net for you to see what I mean gentle reader. If I get a chance, I might do it before the end of the month.

So, gentle reader, have you started in on the banana mystery yet? What am I talking about? Of course not! How dumb can I get? Unless you have some sort of super duper powers that is... Hmmmm!

I hear the generators running in the neighbourhood. Man, I need to get me one that can run the whole house for times like these and, more importantly, for after the big blows. The thing is, I really would like to find some alternative energy type solution. That would be much nicer than either diesel or propane.

Interesting, a little banana bird just flew up and perched on a branch to keep me company for a while. Oh, a couple of them are chasing each other around the yard chirping as they go. I also hear a dove cooing.

(4:31 pm Nov 13, 2006)

It seems like someone just sneaked in and oiled up the time gentle reader. Or some thing like that! Cause all I know is that it seems to have gotten mighty slippery all of a sudden!

(4:41 pm Nov 13, 2006)

Yes, time is slippery all of a sudden, slippery and a slipping and a sliding away. Let's just hope it is now braking and not accelerating. Now, I am aware, gentle reader, that scientifically they are both examples of accelerating as acceleration is a change in velocity. So that when you are slowing down you are, scientifically speaking at least, accelerating and when you are speeding up you are also accelerating.

Now, gentle reader, depending on your background, it may surprise you to hear me say that when you are in your car and you mash down on the brakes t hat you accelerate. Well, some of you driving around in these bondo boxes might have a different tale to tell, but we will not go there. That is a tale that you can tell for your own self.

(4:49 pm Nov 13, 2006)

"I never died a winter yet." (CB Fay Knowles : DT??)

Gentle reader, if that surprises you, here is something else that will likely surprise you as well. If you happen to be going around a bend, you are likewise definitely accelerating! Even if you are doing a steady thirty miles per hour. (Or whatever your preferred units of vehicular speed are.)

(5:50 pm Nov 13, 2006)

Well, gentle reader, the power is back on for about fifteen minutes now. I am still not typing this in the IRC channel just yet as I cannot spare the time yet to type in all that I have just written longhand and if I start putting this into IRC right now, then my works will get even more wonked than it is now. That would not do.

So, four to five hundred more words to go and I am not sure I am having fun yet today. I do know that typing in what I have down on paper is going to be no fun at all...

Let me go on the NaNo forums and see if I can quickly find a cool dare to help me reach two thousand in short order.

(5:53 pm Nov 13, 2006)

Petro had gotten home just after five and was just heading out now for his run, dark had settled in and so once again he was in his reflector vest. As he finished locking his front door and was about to turn around, something green caught his eye. Down on the stoep by the door.

When he looked, it was a large dill pickle with a tooth pick in it with a little flag on it. He stooped down to pick it up and read the flag.

"It's pickle time."

What in the world did that mean? Who in the world could have left that there and how did they leave it there since he came home without him noticing anyone?

Petro loved pickles and was just about to take a big bite when he caught himself. It wasn't that it was dirty as it was resting on a paper plate when he found it. It was just that who knew if it had been doctored by some nut job. The possibilities as to what one could do to a pickle were vast. Even if you eliminated the good things you could do to a pickle, the bad possibilities were still vast. It was not worth biting a pickle of unknown provenance.

"It's pickle time."

What was up with that? Pickle time? Pickle time? Huh?

He put the pickle back down on the stoep and went off on his run. He would deal with it when he got back.

He headed out. After walking for a bout five minutes, he stopped to stretch at the side of the road, using a wall and a street sign as supports. His stretching finished, he started east at a slow jog.

(6:27 pm Nov 13, 2006)

(9:23 pm Nov 13, 2006)

The No Voltage Blues

I got the no voltage blues

I got the no voltage blues

Yeah, B.E.C. is messin with me

I got the no voltage blues

Ouch, come home at around nine o'clock after band practice, no gentle reader, I am not in the band, but I do go to practice. Anyway, before I can get into the house to type in today's work, Bam Sookie! the power went out again! How many hours this time I wonder...

Oh well, perhaps I can get some sleep.

(9:25 pm Nov 13, 2006)